Middle Aged Teen Queen

There is this lady who works in my office who is a massive legend. She is kind of like Lisa Wilkinson, but blonde and doesn’t get to hang out with Carl (Oh, Carl…). She is funny and smart and she has all the jewellery from Diva that I want but am too stingy to buy. Basically I would like to be her.

Anyway – MASSIVE revelation. I think she IS a 40-year-old version of me. The facts are all there:

A. She has a blog. I TOO have a blog! I know many people have blogs – Krudd probably has a blog and I definitely don’t think that means I’m a younger version of him... I am so much cooler than KRudd – BUT, her blog is about random life stuff, just like mine. And it’s called, wait for it… MIDDLE AGED TEEN QUEEN!

B. I too am a teen queen that happens to not be in her teens. I told her this, and she said I could probably get away with being a teen queen since I’m still kind of close to that age-bracket. I agreed and said yes because she is very important in this office and I would I like to keep my job. But in my head I was totally thinking ‘no way man, I am totalllllly too teen for my twenties’. Who else my age totally loves Taylor Swift? Who else totally loves Taylor Lautner? Who else uses ‘totally’ way too many times in a sentence? Who else abbreviates ‘totally’ to ‘totes’??? The answer: no one. Totes.

C. She says she weirdly gets crushes on young men – SO DO I! I know all about being a mad cougar. My last boyfriend was younger than my younger brother which is not just funny - it’s also kind of weird and gross. Plus HE was a bit weird and gross, so there was no compensation for the youngness. The only thing that really brought us together was Miley Cyrus music – and if that isn’t an indication of being a teen queen, then I don’t know what is…other than the fact I would like to marry Zac Efron. If he played rugby. But that’s another story…